I got your diva right here: Four tips for dealing with stress

 

My boss called me a diva this afternoon. If I'm going to be a diva, today, I'd like to be this diva (and I'm not ever sure who she is). In reality, I felt a lot like the guy from "Network," who loses it and goes on a "I'm mad as hell" rant.



 

 

 Okay, I felt a little like Joe Pesci or Robin Williams in one of those Snickers commercials, too.

Anyway, she called me a diva. Normally, I like to think that I define calm when it comes to managing stress and deadlines. But today, I was a mad as hell. The situation doesn't matter much except that I thought one co-worker was being grossly (and obliviously) disrepectful to another, to the point where I found myself across my boss' desk and letting loose with uncharacteristic, some-made-up profanity in describing the offender.

So, if I'm going to be a diva today, I want to be well-armed with a cold-blooded, decision-made face and really cool red gloves.

I say all this because I am impressed with the public relations professionals who maintain calm in the most stressful situations, including (unlike me) when others in their charge are unfairly treated. It's no wonder that The Huffington Post named "public relations" as #7 on its list of the 10 Most Stressful Jobs of 2012.

The Public Relations Society of America (PRSA), in the October 21, 2011 edition of The Public Relations Strategist, discussed the more stressful issues affecting public relations professionals.They ranged from "the internal need to act thoughtfully and strategically and the external pressures of the media’s never-ending news cycle" to the client's reluctance to share information and, as you might guess, the absence of a well-prepared crisis communications plan.

PRSA offers stress management tips in four categories: preparation, teamwork, perspective and practice. As the article explains its tips, it features commentary from public relations professionals. Here are my favorites:

Preparation
"Writing from Afghanistan, Air Force Technical Sergeant Michael Andriacco serves as regional support command, north public affairs officer. 'The best way for me to manage crisis-related stress is to have confidence in the groundwork I’ve laid with my superiors as well as the media and public,' he said.'Without the foundation, my stress would be much higher.'”

Teamwork
"Monica Carazo, communications officer for the Los Angeles Unified School District, offered, 'My crises usually deal with life-and-death situations of students. To lessen the stress, each department member has assigned duties. One PIO talks to the parents. Another takes calls from the field. A third PIO writes media statements'.”

Perspective (my #1 favorite)
"As a former public affairs officer for the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration and National Transportation Safety Board, Phil Frame was responsible for communications during plane crashes and an Amtrak derailment. 'Keep your perspective,' he said. 'I knew there was nothing I could do to bring the victims back to life. My role was to help prevent the next disaster from occurring.' Touching on the importance of planning, Frame, now president of Outcome Assurance Corp in Detroit, added, 'Use your brain, your crisis plan and your instincts to make decisions, not emotions.'”

Practice
"Medical experts caution that extreme stress can lead to an inability to think clearly, headaches and irritability, sometimes resulting in serious health issues. Exercise, get enough rest and remember to eat. Consider taking a break when the crisis is over ... Barbara Kerr, APR, executive director of communications and marketing for Clark College in Vancouver, concluded, 'Remember that this too shall pass. If time allows, then I do crossword puzzles or Sudoku to think about something else . . . while eating dark chocolate.'”

As for me, I'm going shopping for a pair of red gloves and practicing that special "your time is up" stare. Not really the one at the top of the page, but this one (click on photo for theme music):



 

 

Follow me on Twitter -- @FWgib



Like a drought? Listen to the "bull-biosolids"

 

"I don't know nothin' 'bout birthin' babies." If you ask me a "how to" or "what about" question, I feel pretty confident stealing that line from Butterfly McQueen's character, Prissy, in Gone with the Wind. I was the guy in high school who could study for the test and do well, but if you asked me to explain how this week's physics concept applies to what we discussed earlier in the year or how a particular theory applies to a given situation, well, you might as be asking me to help deliver your next child.

I'm a generalist (I prefer that term to "shallow"). I know a little bit (a dangerous little bit) about a lot of stuff, so I've found it safer to remain relatively apolitical. I lean to the left, but if you asked to explain big government vs. trickle-down economics, I'm a goner.

So, normally, "I don't know nothin' 'bout" whatever you might ask, but I do know water supply in Texas. I work at an engineering firm that almost dominates the Texas market in water resources planning and design for water supply projects. Since the Texas Legislature approved SB 1, which authorized the State Water Plan, our firm has been directly involved in the development of nine of the state's 16 regional water supply plan, which collectively becomes the State Water Plan (update every three years). Just as importantly, our engineers have been helping clients in securing hundreds of millions of dollars in Clean Water and Drinking Water State Revolving Fund Loans during the course of the loan program.

Unfortunately, being apolitical has made me a little naive; however, I do pay enough attention to be concerned over the chasm of unbending, no-compromise opinion that I believe is pushing us toward a socio-ethnic civil war. One of my bigger concerns is that far-right platforms over the last few years have thrived on fear and misunderstanding and as a result, have pushed America back into a '60s level of intolerance, frustration and hatred.

Earlier this week, Texas voters approved the use of $2 billion from the State's "Rainy Day Fund" to fund projects called for in the State Water Plan. Known simply as "Prop. 6," the Constitutional amendment provided funding for State Revolving Fund Loans for the next 50 years. Given the matching fund required by public entities like cities, water districts and river authorities, the $2 billion will be leveraged into about $56 billion in construction projects (from a selfish perspective, this program will result in an estimate $100 million in engineering fees each year).

To support the vote for Proposition 6, I posted its logo as my Facebook profile picture and encouraged my Facebook friends to vote. Several "Likes," then one of my far-right friends posted a comment: "No-o-o-o-o-o!"

He then posted a comment and link to my wall, where he talked about the $27 billion the State will be forced to pay (the loan programs may require matching funds by the water provider agencies that use them) and other misinformations, plus a link to a grossly misleading  Texas Observer article: Prop 6: Slush Fund or Solution to Texas’ Water Woes? 

I was shocked. Normally, I blow off right-wing "biosolids" (since I'm in the water business, I'll use the technical term for ... poo) because I am naively apolitical, but knowing something about the State Water Plan and Proposition 6, I couldn't believe how far off base my friend ... my often-outspoken, politically active friend ... a smart guy, was in his comments ... as in out-and-out, no-prisoners-taken wrong.

What's the issue? Where do we as citizens draw the line with allowing media and political spinmasters to simply lie to confuse issues, reinforce prejudices and widen the gap splitting our country? Just as importantly, are we as public relations professionals willing to say "no" to clients whose practices are not "mutually beneficial" (I guess to extremist readers and media they are) and that threaten our professional ethics?

Just in case there's any question about how I really feel:



Follow me on Twitter @FWgib


And just in case you want a quick synopsis of Gone with the Wind (or something like it):



This week in sports: PR pros are 2-0.

I'm not much of a sports guy, but two stories jumped out at me this week, both related to smart PR guys and media placement.

The first is from Sunday's Cowboys-Lions game (Cowboys lost 30-31). Wide receiver Dez Bryant made at two highlight-video catches for touchdowns (he made have made more; I was napping) that were only rivaled by his sideline tantrum that would make the wildest ADHD kindergartner proud. Just in case you missed it, take a look (and this is only one of several incidents).

 

What's impressive are his teammates' responses to media inquiries following the game. In a Fort Worth Star-Telegram article, the Cowboys' coach -- their PR coach, not their football coach -- shines ... well, like the star in the middle of Cowboys' stadium.

Dez invokes Pop Warner football to explain his passion for the game ... a passion demonstrated by sideline tantrums (uhhh ...  yep, tantrums). One "discussion" (his word) was simply to point out that the Cowboys' defense was stopping the Lions and that the Cowboys' offense should politely respond by scoring points. Quarterback Tony Romo even applauded Dez's winning spirit and selflessness, and calls him a "good teammate."

Dez's on-field and off-field childishness is a distraction to the Cowboys, who are struggling to avoid another dismal year by a talented team, and his on-field performance is critical to the team making the playoffs.

More importantly, his on-field performance ... minus the sideline tantrums ... is critical to maintaining the interest of a Cowboys' fan base that is rapidly losing interest. Kudos to the Cowboys' PR guy who scripted Dez, Tony and others, and planted the article in Monday's must-read sports section.

The second story relates to game #2 of the World Series between Boston and St. Louis. NPR reported on the 4-2 Boston win Monday morning. The story included a brief feature on Jonny Gomes, who's home run broke a deadlock tie to put Boston ahead 4-1.

Gomes, described by NPR as "a journeyman who first made it to the majors nearly nine months after a heart attack on Christmas Eve in 2002 (sniffle sniffle)," wasn't even scheduled to play until pre-game batting practice. He was 0-9 in the series until the home run; and, in a post-game interview, he attributed his turnaround to a pep talk by 8-for-11 hitter David Ortiz.

Just like Dez, Gomes takes us all back to childhood. Here's how he described it: "It was like 24 kindergartners looking up at their teacher. He got everyone's attention, and we looked him right in the eyes. That message was pretty powerful."

Here's Gomes home run photo from Sports Illustrated:





NPR broadcast Gomes' comments from a post-game interview, where he thanked mentors and other supporters who helped him get to the majors, then NPR's Mark Memmott talked about Gomes path to baseball. He mentioned Gomes' heart attack, then went into the car accident Gomes was in at 16 that killed his best friend AND followed that with the heart-tugger about his homelessness as a young child (more sniffle sniffle).

My first thought: who is the PR genius who set that up? What a personal, fan-generating story. That's how PR affects the bottom-line.

So, this week in sports, PR pros are 2-0. Go Spin Masters!

Follow me on Twitter: @FWgib

Can toppling a rock topple an organization?

Stupid, stupid, stupid!

As if the Boy Scouts of America didn't have enough public relations problems with its recent anachronistic ambivalence related to the involvement of gay Scouts and leaders, two of its Troop-level volunteers -- two out of more than one million adult leaders throughout the program -- stupidly toppled a 200-million-year-old rock formation in Utah's Goblin Valley AND more stupidly posted a video on Facebook that the Salt Lake City Tribune posted on YouTube.
 
Just in case the print story wasn't damaging enough, the video clarified any misunderstandings or hope for justification by vividly showing the leaders' -- oops, no leadership characteristics there -- the morons' testosterone-laced intent to vandalize the irreplaceable natural landmark, even grossly singing and dancing to the hip-hop tune, "Wiggle It" as the rock falls.
 
I fully understand the operational and public relations challenges that the Boy Scouts of America faces, especially related to matching its national face with its local "boots on the ground." I worked as a full-time, executive staff member for local offices of the Boy Scouts of America for 20 years. 

I loved the work and most of the volunteer leaders I met and collaborated with to deliver quality programs to young people. I enjoyed opportunities that few of my social peers couldn't even imagine, from backpacking in the Rockies to having top-level corporate leaders follow my lead on fund-raising campaigns.
 
From a national perspective, the BSA is torn by its long-time partners -- mostly churches -- on the homosexuality issue, yet few can deny the positive impact of the program.
 
The results of a recent study by Baylor University showed that young men who attain Scouting's highest youth recognition, Eagle Scout, are more likely to have closer relationships with their friends and families and, as adults, to serve in leadership positions at their place of employment or in their communities, contribute to charitable organizations, and be goal-oriented and network with their peers. A visit to the BSA's website shows countless stories of young Scouts performing far beyond the expectations of their peers, many saving lives using skills only acquired through Scouting.
 
But the unit-level program is the core of the Scouting program. That's where young people reap the benefits of being in Scouting, and I remain amazed at the opportunities I've seen given to young people as a result of caring, role-model volunteer leadership.
 
On the other hand ... In 1988, when I was working for the Boy Scouts in Houston, the national organization opened the door to women to become Scoutmasters, a role limited only to men since the organization's founding in 1910. We arranged a media event at a local church for a TV station's to interview our area's first female Scoutmaster and to get feedback from other unit-level leaders and Scouts.
 
Most of the counter arguments to women as Scoutmasters focused on the need of young men to have male role models that could help shape their character, citizenship and personal fitness (BSA goals at the time). I vividly remember the video footage that accompanied these arguments: a slow scan of a group of pot-bellied male Scout leaders who'd spent more than their share of time sampling Dutch Oven cobblers (a camping delicacy). Good men, but visually in direct conflict with the BSA's stated goals.
 
And then there are those like the Goblin Valley duo. Every organization has them somewhere, just waiting for that stupid gene to launch them into the spotlight.

Interestingly, Fox13, a television news outlet in Salt Lake City, reported that the rock-topplers were on a church camp-out; however, most other new sources have focused on the men's Boy Scout connection and have reported that eight Scouts were with them. So, were the men on a sanctioned Boy Scout activity, or is the media focusing on the men's involvement with the Boy Scouts of America and its close tie to outdoor stewardship to give one more swift (but lingering) kick to a stumbling organization?
 
How much control can an non-profit organization the size of the Boy Scouts of America have over the 24/7 actions of its volunteers? More importantly, do organizations like the Boy Scouts of America, when failing to take a relevant and firm stand on societal issues, hurt themselves and the beneficiaries of their services more? And are those organizations painting a target on their backs by the mishandling of the larger public relations challenges and then enduring harsher media response as a result of localized issues?
 
The BSA is managing this episode as well as can be expected at this point, and I think they're headed in the right direction. Here's the official statement, as posted on the local office's website serving the Goblin Valley area (and not found on the national BSA site):
 
In regards the recent incident in Goblin Valley, the Utah National Parks Council releases the following statement:

We are shocked and disappointed by this reprehensible behavior. For more than a century, the Boy Scouts of America has been a leader in conservation—from stewardship to sustainability. We teach our 2.6 million youth members and 1.1 million adult members, who collectively spend more than 5.5 million nights outdoors, the principles of “Leave No Trace.” These principles stress a commitment to maintaining the integrity and character of the outdoors and all living things.

The isolated actions of these individuals are absolutely counter to our beliefs and what we teach. We are reviewing this matter and will take appropriate action.

On background, for additional information about what Scouting teaches, please visit: http://www.scouting.org/scoutsource/boyscouts/teachingleavenotrace.aspx.
 
Just as an aside ...

I think the Boy Scouts of America will allow openly gay adults to become volunteer leaders. In a similar environment, it won a case to prevent women from becoming Scoutmasters in 1987, but reversed its stance in 1988, I'm thinking, to acknowledge the changing needs of our society and to better serve more young people.

The same logic will prevail, and the BSA will take a hit from its chartered partners (local "sponsors" like churches, civic clubs, etc.). But if it stays the course and maintains focus on its core mission, it will survive, even with abandonment by more conservative churches (probably not the BSA's staunchest supporters for most of its history anyway) and the onslaught of Scouting "alternatives" (that I won't link to because I want no association).

If it doesn't, it's dead.

Follow me on Twitter: @FWgib

Judas: a bad hiring decision = bad PR

(author's note: this is not a personal Christian testimony, nor an offer to debate the Godliness of Jesus Christ, the literal interpretation of the Bible, the gender of God, the eternal status of Judas, or the demonic influence of "Jesus Christ Superstar" ... and, yes, there is a PR lesson in here)


Sometimes I'm embarrassed because I'm Peter, ripping out my sword to fight the good fight, typing words with all the smoothness of a rapier whipping through the air ... and then I accidentally cut off some poor bystander's ear. As passionate and fiery as can be, but maybe just a little off-center of understanding or communicating the real message.

As a communications professional, I sometimes I like to think I'm Paul and have been blessed with the gifts of empathy, understanding and persuasion, of being all things to all men. Best communications advice ever: be as shrewd as a snake, but as innocent as a dove.

Other times I feel like Job, sitting pitifully on my dung heap. Unlike the ever-patient Job though, I'm asking, "How did I end up in (cause) this mess? Why doesn't anybody understand me?"

But this time, I recognized myself in Judas. Not the traditional Judas-the-hated-betrayer, but Judas, the overly cautious. Judas, the disillusioned opportunist. Judas, the "problem."

A few months ago, I took a trip back in time to watch "Jesus Christ Superstar;" and that's when I noticed. Singing Heaven on Their Minds, Judas warns Jesus about his followers turning on him:

Listen Jesus I don't like what I see
All I ask is that you listen to me

And remember - I've been your right hand man all along

You have set them all on fire

They think they've found the new Messiah

And they'll hurt you when they find they're wrong

 

And then after telling Jesus that everything he says gets "twisted in some other way" and positing that he would be safer remaining a carpenter, he shows fear when he warns of Roman backlash:
Listen Jesus do you care for your race?
Don't you see we must keep in our place?

We are occupied - have you forgotten how put down we are?

I am frightened by the crowd

For we are getting much too loud

And they'll crush us if we go too far

And that's where I begin to collect my 30 pieces of silver. I like to think of myself as an independent rogue with unquestionably smooth collaborative skills; but I really like the status quo.

And that's also where I admire the true public relations professional who recognizes and thrives with opportunity and stands firm under duress. I'm great as long as all is good. A small hiccup, and I'm still there for you. Some grumbling among the troops, and I'm becoming hesitant and offering "insight" into alternatives. A plausible threat to success, and I sometimes go straight to "it's been real, and it's been fun, but ..."

I couldn't have been surprised more to see Judas and find myself saying, "hey, that's me." I had to fill a week of Sunday School earlier this month and based my lesson on this thought. I did a little research on Judas and gained some interesting insight.

Judas was the Apostles' money man. He handled all the funds, and in talking with our class, I asked them to consider an imaginary firm, "Jesus, Inc." (not the existing non-profit). Peter would be its chief operating officer, and Judas would be its chief financial officer.

In my own mind, I took a step further. Fortunately, for those of us who are believers, Jesus' death and resurrection is part of the grand plan; but the imaginary "Jesus, Inc." had a serious public relations problem, both internally and externally.

Judas definitely was an outsider. All the rest of Jesus' apostles were from Galilee, and some Biblical scholars associate Judas' Iscariot name with the town of Kerioth, near the Dead Sea and FAR south of Galilee. 

More importantly, Iscariot is a name associated with Zealots, or those militaristic Jews who wanted to overthrow the Romans occupying their homeland. The Jews had been waiting for a messiah or king, like the Old Testament kings, who could bring them back to power; and Judas may have followed Jesus so he could be there when the first shots of the revolution were fired (thrown? hurled? catapulted?).

In other words, Judas was ready for the fight. He had a cause, and Jesus was his ticket to winning. Unfortunately for Judas, "Jesus, Inc." had an entirely different mission. Back in the day, I was told by supervisors that I was hard to manage. Like Judas, I sometimes missed the bigger picture because I was painting my own.

Judas eventually recognized that Jesus was not going to win him his personal throne overlooking miles and miles and miles and miles of sand (and he probably hadn't learned about the oil yet). He even saw Jesus as a detriment to his goal, a thorn in the side of his enemies who, riled, could easily and readily crush everything in their path.
 
And that's when he went to the Jewish high priests and elders to work out the details. Afraid that Jesus would force the Romans to upset their comfortable status quo, in "Superstar," the high priests sing "This Jesus Must Die." 

When Judas sings "Damned for All Time" in Superstar -- "I came because I had to I'm the one who saw; Jesus can't control it like he did before" -- the viewer gets a better understanding of his Zealot motives (a Jesus-era Eric Snowden?).

And if you can't accept that Jesus' death and resurrection provides hope to a dying world (one way or the other), then maybe Judas' character has a point about "Jesus, Inc.'s" PR problems, when he sings the title song, "Superstar:"

Why you let the things you did get so out of your hand
You'd have managed better if you'd had it planned

Why'd you choose such a backward time and such a strange land?

If you'd come today you would have reached a whole nation

Israel in 4 BC had no mass communication

 

And that's the PR lesson.

• For those publics, internal and external, who just don't get our message, how do we adjust?
• How do we strengthen our message and our plan to be sure it endures under stress? 
• How do we address those "followers" who do us more damage than good, who misunderstand and misrepresent our mission?
• Have we tested our message to be sure it's audience-focused and clearly communicated with a minimum of being "twisted in some other way" by our opponents or those we'd like to sway to our side.
• Are we still in "Israel in 4 BC?" Or are we professionals using the most effective, current tools and methods to develop that coveted "mutually beneficial" PR relationship with our client's public?

Finally, do we have a strategic communications plan customized to the goals and informed interests of our client? Or are we our client's "Judas," focusing on our own goals and simply offering our client a cookie-cutter approach to publicity and column inches?


Follow me on Twitter: @FWgib

The rewards of doing "the manly thing"

It's that time of the year, and I didn't even think about it until a class discussion this evening on Lance Armstrong and the effect of his fall from grace on his Livestrong Foundation.

I don't remember the exact date except that it was a Tuesday evening in September 2004. I'd just crawled into bed and was doing what I refer to as "the manly thing" -- scratching and adjusting (yes, young people, romance can stay in your relationship).

And sometimes, you just know. My right testicle felt as hard and large as a pecan (a good-sized pecan, of course). A double-check, a calm-down deep breath, and I turned to my wife in the dark and said, "Feel this." Misunderstanding my motives, her response: "I'm already asleep."

I didn't know anything about testicular cancer, but I just knew; and I spent half the night on the Internet. Risk higher in tall men. Risk about five times higher among white men than Blacks or Hispanics. Oh, crap. Family history ... none, so okay there, except that only about 3 percent of men diagnosed have a family history of testicular cancer.

Good news! "About half of testicular cancers occur in men between the ages of 20 and 34." Bad news -- "But this cancer can affect males of any age, including infants and elderly men." I'd always been immature, but to get a young man's disease in my late 40s? Survival rate -- 95 percent. What about that other 5 percent (I'm an optimist until ...)?

The next few days were a whirlwind. Called my family doctor Wednesday morning. His receptionist was going to schedule me for the following week. When I told her why I wanted to see the doctor, she put me on hold to talk with the doctor; and when she came back on the line, she asked, "How soon can you get here?"

My family doctor scheduled me for a sonogram on Thursday. When he saw the results, he referred me to a urologist, who I saw on Friday.

We weren't active in a church, and I hadn't learned of God's gift of Grace yet, but I called my sister -- the one I'd referred to as a "holy-roller" for years -- and asked for her prayers. I remember thinking, "I need the A-Team on this one."

My visit with the urologist wrapped up with "I can't do the surgery tomorrow, but let's get you in first thing Monday morning."

What!!!? Can't do the surgery tomorrow? How urgent is this?

Longest weekend of my life. The doctor never used the word "cancer," but talked about a seminoma. I told my wife that I didn't really understand, but that we were getting up at 4 a.m. Monday to get "something" cut off.

I thought about my kids growing up. I thought about how Kim and I always talked about growing old together. I thought about harems I could guard as a eunuch (sometimes it's hard to shake a maudlin sense of humor). And I thought about standing waist-deep in waste materials and trash when I worked at the DuPont refinery the summer after high school graduation.

Three distinct memories of the surgery:

Handing me a pen, the prep staff asked, "Mr. Bowden, will you put an X by the testicle we're supposed to remove?"

"Mr. Bowden, I'm your anesthesiologist, and this will help you rela..."

And then Kim trying to sleep in a straight-back, recovery-room chair next to my bed. I'd look up, giggle and go back to sleep ... several times. I was enjoying the best sleep of my life.

Following my surgery, I went through radiation treatments, and I almost felt guilty for being able to walk in and out of the surgery center knowing that all would be well. Many of my fellow patients weren't so lucky. Many had to be wheeled in for what must've been the last-attempt chemotherapy treatments. Others stopped showing up, and even in the age of HIPPA regulations, the technicians' sad conversations hinted at the inevitable.

I even thanked people in stores who I saw wearing the yellow Livestrong bracelets.

A few years later, I started reading Lance Armstong's "It's Not About the Bike: My Journey Back to Life." Lance failed to read the signs. His testicle grew to the size of an orange before he sought a diagnosis (how can you bicycle with a testicle the size of an orange?).

If I remember correctly, Lance's cancer metasticized into his lungs and then his brain. I thought about how quickly my week went from my Tuesday-night doing "the manly thing" to Monday-morning surgery. And I almost passed out. I was so grateful for the receptionist who asked, "How soon can you get here?" and the surgeon who said, "first thing Monday." But I still couldn't finish Lance's book.

Lance Armstrong 'fessed up to using performance enhancing drugs during his Tour de France victories when he appeared on the Oprah Winfrey show in January. NPR broadcast an interview with Livestrong Foundation CEO Doug Ulman the following day, prior to part two of the Oprah interview.

PR professionals should take notes. Ulman was brilliant in his responses to queries about Armstrong's lying about his drug usage. He stayed the course. 

Listen to the interview, but here are a couple of his responses related to knowledge of the doping and the impact of the scandal on the foundation:

 "You know, Lance obviously founded the organization. And his story, his cancer journey, resonated with millions of people. And the Livestrong Foundation and Livestrong Movement is now at a point where it is moved beyond any one individual, and it's about literally millions of people who, unfortunately, are facing or have faced this illness themselves."

And later ...

"Well, I'll definitely watch (the interview with Oprah Winfrey) because it's important to me and to the organization. And I think it's going to take a while for people of all walks of life to process this. But ultimately, come Tuesday, this foundation is going to be, again, 100 percent focused on fulfilling our mission of serving those with cancer."

Awesome responses.

So, for me, I don't give a (insert your own point of emphasis) about what Lance ate, drank or injected. I'd like to tell him to keep his jerseys, kind of as a gift from me. I just want to say, "thanks."


Follow me on Twitter: @FWgib

(flying) Machine I Loathe to Fly

I thought it was just me. My wife, daughter and I flew Spirit Airlines for a spring-break trip to Florida, and I hated it. The cattle-car atmosphere and the I'd-rather-be-anywhere-but-here in-flight staff were only topped by the guy driving the tractor that pulled luggage carts up the plane. He ran into the front tire of the plane!

They herded us off the plane, and apparently the airline's relationship is so bad with other airlines that if the damage would've grounded the plane, no other airline would honor Spirit tickets and accept its passengers. Spirit offers so few flights that we'd have to wait until the following day to catch another flight.
 
I hate Spirit Airlines and have now vowed to never fly it again. NPR featured a story on Spirit's MILF advertising campaign ... that would be "More Islands. Lower Fares." for any of you porn-seekers whose search found the acronym. For the "culturally" deprived, MILF was popularized in the movie "American Pie" (warning: graphic description of MILF).

It does get worse: following the Anthony Weiner uproar, Spirit ran an ad with the tagline "The Weiner Sale: With fares too hard to resist."

I'm committed now. These people are so grossly offensive that I'll swim to Florida before I attempt to sit in one of their 3/4-size mini-seats again.
 
So I thought it was just me until I began looking for Spirit employee survey results to learn how this crass approach to marketing and promotion affected employee morale and retention. It certainly seems to have affected employees' driving abilities.
 
Instead, I found several sites with customer-survey results. I think the Facebook site, Boycott Spirit Airlines, pretty much sums up the customer sentiment I found on other websites. Check out these holiday postings:
 
"Sorry kids. The Easter Bunny was coming this weekend to hide eggs, but Spirit Airlines canceled his flight for no reason."
 
"If your mom's flying Spirit this Mother's Day, you might want to send the flowers to the airport.... There's a good chance they will cancel the flight for no good reason. Spirit, you suck."
 
"Its Memorial Day. I'm sure Spirit's busy screwing over a vet."
 
And between holidays: "If dog poop had a spirit... It would be called Spirit Airlines."
 
The MILF campaign was an email effort directed to existing customers who had signed up for Spirit's distribution list. Spirit's Director of Communications acknowledged that the airline had received some letters of complaint; however, he also said, in an interview with ABC News that "most found the connection amusing rather than offensive and that customers are responding to the airfare deals."

You have to give Spirit's public relations people credit. They've trained their President Ben Baldanza. In an interview with hard-charging Bill O'Reilly on Fox News' "The O'Reilly Factor," Baldanza snagged some free ad time with his response to O'Reilly's attack on the MILF ad. Baldanza replied, "Our consumer feedback has been positive, and the only thing we think is obscene is the fares that most of our competitors charge."

All I can say to Spirit is "Your mama is SO ugly that she'd never be on anyone's ..." well, never mind.


Follow me on Twitter: @FWgib