If you have to have one ...

If you have to have one, this is it. A favorite obituary of one of my friends:

Wilma Katarina Molbert, 74, of Baytown died peacefully in her beloved apartment on Wednesday. Loving family members and devoted friends surrounded her bedside. Wilma's last hours were filled with laughter, sweet stories, prayer and singing.

What a wonderful way to die ... enjoying your final moments sharing in the joy of life with loved ones. I haven't seen Wilma in more than 30 years, but she passed away exactly like I remembered her living it.

What if everlasting life is simply the legacy that we leave behind ... and heaven is composed of the joyous memories and the laughter your descendants share when they tell stories about you. And hell ... well, nothing; everybody just forgets.

At my dad's funeral, everyone had a 'George story' to share, and now I wonder if that's how friends and family help create a heaven for the loved one they've lost. My mother's funeral went the same way, and there were even some stories that portrayed my mother in a gutsy manner that I'd never recognized.

I admire my friend Wilma's family and how they helped her face her passing as a celebration of a wonderful life. And, without words, they told her that her heaven is secure. Sharing moments of joy while facing the loss of a close friend or family member takes courage, faith and selflessness. Tell your loved one that he or she how special they've made your life and how they'll be remembered.

What a wonderful way to die ... except for maybe the 84-year-old softball teammate of a friend who had a heart attack rounding third base ... or, to paraphrase a crusty former co-worker, 'to die at 99, shot by a jealous husband.'

I promise to be a better person (fingers crossed!)

On my honor, I promise to be a better person. Can I stop there? Here are my 2009 resolutions (and since this is the end of January, I guess 'stop procrastinating' should be #1) . . .

1. Blog at least once a week. I've gotten out of the habit (and nothing ever sounds quite right). Current status: it's the end of January, and this is my first blog.

2. Run in the White Rock Half-Marathon. Thank God it's not until December. Daughter #1 and I talked about running it together. Fortunately, she's a worse runner than I am. Current status: I'm thinking about buying a pair of running shoes this weekend.

3. Lose 20 pounds: I started off the year about 206 pounds. Current status: Last week, I weighed in at 210 pounds.

4. Complete at least one home improvement project every weekend: I probably need to add 'finish painting the porch railing (started in 1997)' and 'finish trim on front porch (started in 2004).' Current status: I helped my wife re-decorate the living room by putting up crown molding and replacing the baseboards. Unfortunately, she said, 'while you have your tool belt out . . .' and I ruined my home improvement plans for the next three weekends.

5. Plant a garden. Actually this is my wife's idea, but I do all the grunt work. The evening sun fries our backyard, and our ground is like concrete. Other than that, it should fun. Current status: I bagged some leaves and hope they'll compost themselves.

6. Value time. This one's all encompassing. I can't even begin to estimate the amount of time I waste screwing around on the computer or not doing what I should be doing because I don't think I have time. Current status: See current status on most everything above.

7. Spend more one-on-one time with daughter #2. Daughter #2 is an attention sucker, but most of her earlier life was spent at her sister's soccer games and volleyball games and basketball games. We've been spending more time together on the weekends, and I've been 'forcing her' to practice her French Horn while I 'listen.' Current status: I'm blogging and she's watching TV.

8. Don't worry; be happy. I think I've aged more in the last 3-5 years than during any period in my life. Money, daughter #1, money, daughter #2, money, son and money. Probably need to adhere more to my WWJBD philosophy: What would Jimmy Buffett do? Current status: Just bought daughter #1 a new car. Company bonus is going to build a new fence (hey, see #4). Guess I better work on this one, too.

9. Join a church. Why do they have to meet on Sunday mornings? Or Saturday evenings? My wife and I need this for our own peace of mind, and daughter #2 needs it to build a stronger foundation, spiritually and socially. A friend describes our church life as flavor of the week. I grew up Catholic, my wife Southern Baptist (in Maryland?). We've attended Church of Christ, Methodist, Southern Baptist, Interdenominational, Non-denominational, and a few others. Current status: why do they have to meet on Sunday mornings?

10. Bring joy to others. This is the easiest one and the hardest one. It's simple to smile or say a nice word to someone, but what about someone who really needs it? And being needy, high maintenance and all about me, I love to be told that I'm a nice guy. Current status: I've shopped at the neighborhood WalMart the last two evenings after work. This one's going to have to wait.

Okay, check off #1 (at least until next week).